the power of anything you do makes you high and drunk

thumb_up thumb_down +81

The ability to give yourself any super power, but you cannot use it if it is used.

thumb_up thumb_down +79

The power to gain 400 pounds in 400 seconds.

thumb_up thumb_down +79

The power to be asleep while in bed

thumb_up thumb_down +79

The power to know what you would look like if you were ugly.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

the power to fall at 9.9m per second.

thumb_up thumb_down +75

The power to look TV

thumb_up thumb_down +75

The power to win any game against a 5-year-old.

thumb_up thumb_down +75

The ability to fart, hiccup, vomit, crap, burp, laugh, cry, scream and sneeze all at the same time

thumb_up thumb_down +73

the power to hover an inch above the ground once every month.

thumb_up thumb_down +71

The power to teleport 13,000,000,000 lightyears but not be able to return.

thumb_up thumb_down +71

The power to punch with the force of hulk ... But Die instintly

thumb_up thumb_down +71

The power to know all the answers in the test when the test is over

thumb_up thumb_down +69

The power of slowing down your reflexes respond whenever you want.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

thumb_up thumb_down +65

The power to slightly disfigure anything made out of macaroni.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

The power to make Justin Bieber be dead but only when you are listening to someone good at singing

thumb_up thumb_down +63

The power to have a pointless power.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

what do you call someone who never says hello............................ a shy person

thumb_up thumb_down +63

The power to have 50%-78% water in your body

thumb_up thumb_down +61

The power to make sense of Donald Trump

thumb_up thumb_down +61

power to fly when your underwater

thumb_up thumb_down +59

The power to answer trivia questions, but only being able to do so in a loud, aggressive voice.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

The power to absorb energy wavelengths, in the visible light spectrum, from objects and create a mental picture of the shape and color of the objects they reflected off of.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!