The power to disappear only when you're about to have sex.

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the power to suck at absolutly everything you do, except at failing.

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The ability to forget how to breathe automatically.

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THE SUPER FRIENDS HEROES LEAGUE OF SUPER HEROES OF LESSER USEFUL HEROES! KNIGHT FARTSALOT!: Fear my methane! You and me in one small room for 3 days and you will faint for sure! Uncle Diabeetush: Save their parents Captain! Ill take care of their children! Captain Novolin: I have great sugar level control! Help me! Evil Mistress Sugarpie is too sweet! Runald MagnifiCient Donalds: HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR WOOOOO! I keep American people from starvation! Remember kids less than 250 pounds counts as starvation! And their LEADER... MORAL MAN!: The hell am I introducing myself here for? Damn you Subconscious! How can you expect people to understand my genius of putting myself here! They are morons! Oh... hi everybody.. wazzup?

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The ability to transform yourself into a Turkey but only with a brain larger than the head of a turkey. Note: People will become happy if they eat you for christmas.

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The power to suck a golf ball through a garden hose

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the power to hurl apples at force but only when you have drunk 20 litres of water in one go

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the power to convert oxygen and glucose to water and carbon dioxide every time you breathe.

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the ability to invent cheese and toast

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The Power to float on water, except when you're wet..

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The power to sleep with your eyes open.

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The power to moves in slow motion.

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the ability to wake up on an elephant

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The power to be normal and average

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The ability to get up from the couch.

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The power to fly while masturbating.

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The super power to power any electronics at will. But you need 999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 Apms in your body to power a phone for 0,0000000001 seconds.

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The ability to like this post

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the power to to deep fry anything deep fried

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the ability to solve paradoxes

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The power to smell WiFi Signals

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Moral: THUMBS UPS SOLDIER!

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The ability to turn things into gold, but only when the material the item is made of is more valuable than gold.

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Ability to be Austin Calhoun when hes sick

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!