The power to hear in the dark.

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The power to sit for extended periods of time in front of the computer doing pointless things. The person who is reading this has that pointless superpower otherwise he would be doing something productive.

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You can hear what people think ...in sign language.

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The power to poop in the worst time ever and you cannot control it

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The power to talk to plants but only when they have mean things to say.

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The power to vomit every time you burp.

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The power to predict the present

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the power to defecate while standing up...

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the power to create a meme

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the power to charge rechargeable batteries.

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The power to magically generate drugs in your pockets, but only while being arrested or in a police station.

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The power to see through glass

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the ability to get the chills when someone close to you has an erection.

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The power to smell a fart from a 500 mile radius.

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the power to see everyone as a tree

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the power to be friends with Donald trump

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The power to spit venom, but it misses 99.9% of the time.

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the power to turn into a tree

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The power to find the droid you're looking for.

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The power to solve any problem with another problem e.g. Putting out a house fire with a flash flood.

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The ability to dehydrate yourself at will.

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The power to summon a green Hippo that would mush up your poop in your toilet. Oddly, the superpower is only able to be summonded one a year, sorry.

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the power to look directly at the sun only if it is on the other side of the earth

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The power to ride a camel when slapping a donkeys butt cheeks

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!