the power to enter a coma.

The power to summon your mom so you can prove she's not as fat as the chav in front of you is saying she is

The power to be stupid reading this.

teleport to the place where you stand

The power to throw Go stones to the board so that thei form the word 'Go'

The power to part clouds when there are no clouds.

The power to to type Pointless Super Powers

The power to sharpen a pen

The power to eat 2 hotdogs in the same bun

The power to have a very keen sense of smell 24/7 but only when a fart is present

The power to not have a superpower

the power to get sick

to be one second faster than 5mph in any 80's arcade game using one finger to push the buttons

The power to know you don't have a superpower

the power to disappear up your own asshole

The power to grow more genitals.

The power to piss as if you were in zero gravity and leave your big piss ball floating in the bathroom.

The power to teleport yourself anywhere you want except for your major organs.

The power to have an internal monologue voiced by Morgan Freeman.

The power to shoot iron from your blood

The power of having the answer to every possible question, but also to have no way of describing said answers!

the power to walk on land.

The ability to get shot, for real.

The ability to walk on your hands because your feet have nails in them.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!