the power to look like a boy and sing like a girl (bieber joke)

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the power to predict the outcome of any event after it's already happened

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Having taste buds in your anus.

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The ability to control dairy products

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The power to turn into a pineapple that can teleport into a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died because of a pine apple that was in a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died.

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The power to die

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The power to read terms and conditions

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The power to shoot glue from your penis

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the power to take a poo everywhere but on the toilet

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Super strength that works for a millisecond.

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The power to be gangsta, only in front of true gangsta's.

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The power to have a device to turn the tv off without touching it!!! :O

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the power to sleep while standing!

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the powers to be a fat gassy woman

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The ability to have all your dreams be nightmares that you remember vividly.

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The power to be able to see 1 second into the future

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The power to click the left button of your mause, only by thinking of how you click it,while your finger is on the button.

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The power to be invisable but for only 5 seconds or the power to fly but only 2 feet off the ground.

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The power to not think of a productive power.

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The ability to recall lyrics of particularly terrible music with perfect accuracy.

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The power to induce vomiting after a crazy junk food spree.

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The power of confusing the word "your" for "you're", or vice versa.

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the power to cook sandwiches when married

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The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!