The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

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The power to hurt your enemies but feel their pain

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The power to not think of a productive power.

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The ability to to die whenever you want. RIP

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The power to time travel 60 seconds a minute

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the power to write on cellophane

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the power to have another pointless superpower

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Being able to transform into anything on and off the planet, only, you have to be touching that object.

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The ability to stop farting so that you blow up like a balloon that eventually bursts.

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The power to lick your own elbow

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The power to attract lightning strikes to yourself.

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to poop a penny every year

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The ability to mess up a Rubix Cube with your mind

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the power to dislike this power

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The power to feel double the pain when you get kicked in the balls.

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the power to itch your teeth

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the power to fold a piece of paper in half 8 times

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power to make the most lethal fart know to man but only when you girlfriends is around

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Being only half invisible.

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The power to toss you`re limbs at your enemies, but not to re-attach them.

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The ability to change your hair color to your current hair color

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The power to make anyone even on live tv such as news or sports to explosively crap their pants.

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the power to kill someone if you shoot them in the heart

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The power to throw fireballs only under water

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!