Every time you clap some one dies

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The power to understand irony.

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The power to spit so hard and fast that you hit yourself in the back of the head every time... and it can only be used once, because its so hard it goes trough everything...(thus hits you in the skull duh) including your skull... Moral: Remember kids! Protect, Serve and Survive, and ask your mommy and daddy why they make the sexytime... their response may be pretty interesting...

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The power to waste time and sit around doing nothing and not helping society when you could be doing something productive

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The power to see through solid objects, but only when said solid object is transparent.

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The power to fly.......but only in your underwear.

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the power to put your shoes on faster than you did before

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The power to do reverse moonwalk

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The power to be fireproof under water

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the power to pay 1 cent less then what items in the store cost

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The power to be invisible when no one is looking at you!

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The power to have 99 problems, except your dog... if she is female.

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The power to stop time whenever you get stabbed in the liver

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The power to turn into a pebble

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the ability to turn into the body of a car. Just the body, no engine, no wheels, nothin, just the body

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The power to uncontrollably laugh and point at every black guy you see

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The power of being pointless

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The power to jerk off without using your hands

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the ability bend your legs in a perfect circle

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The power to see through things but you can't turn it off once turned on.

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The power to turn into random objects

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The power to smell farts from miles away

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the power to eat an apple in an instant but you dont like apples

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the power to read your own mind the power of 75% levitation the power of turning into a juicy pork chop in the presence of a lion the power to believe it is butter the power to turn into a blender once and never change back the power to cry acid the power of turning highly visable while trying to sneak the power to speak, sneeze and cough really loudly and annoyingly the power to teleport half of your body the power to age extremely fast the power to have the patience to write this the power to read all of these d pwer 2 rite stupeedlee the power to thumbs down this (it also makes you look stupid) the power to only speek in sarcasm the power to see the past (not the future) emit eht lla sdrawkcab etirw ot rewop eht

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!