The power to be fireproof under water

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The power to have 99 problems, except your dog... if she is female.

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The power to see your reflection with The Mirror

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The power to become perfect. Perfect: There can be only one moral man.

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The power to fart to inside. By mouth.

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The power to fly 3 inches.

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The power to control Rollie pollies

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The power to know what someone thought, after they told you.

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The power to make clean socks dirty.

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the power to write about pointless super powers in universes that nothing exists.

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The power to jerk off without using your hands

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The power to be hating when you see me rollin. Moral: ;D

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The power to remove all flavour from food.

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The power to levitate 3cm off the ground when no one is watching

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The power to turn into random objects

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The power to quote Castlevania quotes all day... yelling them out on the streets! Moral: WHAT IS A MAN! People look at me and laugh... and moral man struts past... he has never been so awesome before... They see me rollin... they laughing... they lovin... and I hope nobody calls the ambulance because I am crazy... in love... I can see it in your eyes... I can see it in your smiiileeee...

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The power to give onesself a heart attack just by thinking about it.

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The power to eat as many ice cubes as you want without getting a brain freeze.

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the power to explain accidents when nobody gives a rats ass anymore

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the power to eat an apple in an instant but you dont like apples

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The power to eat food, unless you're touching food.

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the power to go slower than a snail :l

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The ability to not get sunburn, but only at night.

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The power to go back in time, but only 1 second back and with a 10 second recharge.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!