The power to be toilet paper and never run out of paper but still keep your sense of taste

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being able to blow up and die

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The power to spontaneously combust into trillions of microscopic kittens, every time you stare a cat photo for more then 3 hours.

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The ability to grow a third nostril.

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The ability to have every possible thought as fast as the Flash is capable of moving and faster and know how every scenario can, will, and most likely will play out, yet you cannot say anything about them and they cannot be put to use. As well as no one can read your mind or anything similar to obtain said knowledge.

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The power to hear people from across the globe, make people move with your own mind, and the ability to make people disappear from the Earth. Ladies and Gentleman, I call it MMORPG!

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The power to break your legs before hitting the ground after jumping off of heights

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The ability to fart and pee twice in one go.

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The power to give your grandma amazing orgasms.

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The power to grow your toenails, but only one at a time.

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The power to sleep on road trips but only if you're not in a car.

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The ability to turn into a were-turtle when exposed to the full moon.

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the power to fly while under water

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The power to become CHUCK NORRIS! (if you are a teen) Which by activation you realize he is just a mediocre actor... and worst... over 70 years of age...

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The power to determine after 1 year that something is broken when you yourself have done it deliberately broken

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The ability to not have an ability (The ability to be a paradox)

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The power to shoot a any amount of milk out of your belly button every July 4th at 2 o'clock

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The power to type good morals under your comments. Moral: Ever seen me post an actual moral (even less a GOOD one?) Pssh! There is no such thing as good, not that I am aware of at least >:)

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The power to grow the most sexy tits ever. (If your a straight man)

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The ability to read a doctor's handwriting

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The power to be interrupted in mid sent- "Shut up! I'm trying to sleep!"

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the power to not die only when someone shoots you in your left heel.

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The power to become a lime only when you're left nipple brushes against your left shoe whilst it is superglued to your ding dong and you're strapped to a bed naked in the woods.

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The ability not to be able to make a bong out of a taco bell cup

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!