the power to be really itchy.

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the power to shit bricks

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The power to ressurect anyone alive by killing them first. Works only 10 percent of the time...

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the power to be permanently unconfortable.

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The power to make ice sculptures out of marble

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the power of having super fast growing body hair. It grows a half inch a day.

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The power to see thru windows and turn door knobs.

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The power to speak Italian fluently while dining in a Chinese restaurant.

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The power to see out of the back of your head but never the front

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The Power Hear Everything that happens within the closest McDonald's

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The power to give your wife rights

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The ability to steal, without getting caught, other people's pocket lint.

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Turning into a brick wall. Forever.

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The power to be super strong, but you have to be totally wasted for it to work.

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The power to eat toxic waste as long as it is not toxic but die from non-toxic waste and stuff

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The ability to scream and whisper at the same time.

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the power to quickly re-wrap christmas presents

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The power to burst into flames but not be immune to heat.

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The power to erase stupid blogs or comments

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The power to see into the present

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The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

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The power to only be drunk while driving.

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The power to be yourself.

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the power to fly two inches above solid ground at the speed you walk

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!