The ability to read any language and understand it perfectly but only in pitch black darkness.

The ability to go on cheeseburger.com whenever you want, but only when the teacher is in the room

The ability to know how someone felt exactly 1 year prior but you don't know why.

My charms is my superpower, but damn I cant shut up after spending some quality time with the ladies! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! MY BODY WAS NOT READY! I feel like yelling out my real name, but you know, if you know me (I am easily recognizable) the girls I spend time with would feel like I am bragging about them, and I am not, I am simply celebrating my conquest, you see, you came, you saw... BUT I CONQUERED! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT Moral: Feel free to thumb this down, my superpowers need to be contained, or else I will beep my way to an early grave! Girls, mwah... and you know, just dodge the kiss if you cant handle love personified, they arent homing nor anything... Should I ask my doctor if she has any medications that will help me wire down after uh... Multiple female company? HAHAHAHAAAAAAH!... The thought made me kinda sad, im better, now just to prove to my company here that I got balls of steel, I am gonna post this and let you judge me all you want! BECAUSE YOU CANT HAVE EM!

The power to look like another person, but only if the other person is uglier

The ability to do a backflip on a trampoline, but only if you are picking your nose and eating a carrot at the same time

The power to write any thing on your chest with clear paint

Having the ability to drink bleach and not die. You only get really sick.

the power to be indestructable to ballistics, falls, poisons and other potentially lethal things however everyday mundane things will be hazardous to yourself

The power to psychically give politicians half baked excuses for failed and immoral decisions.

the powr to reed thiss befor you relisze the that thiss peersoon is retarded

The power to fly, but only when on the ground

The power to climb ladders faster.

I HAVE A TINY PINGAS! (Penis) Moral: Ladyfriend here daring me to post this here, PFF! Is that even a dare? I got balls of steel! Oh, and I should totally ask my doctor if she can give me something that helps me unwind after multiple female company, or at least they are daring me all to type that pff! Im not even good looking... And noooooo, nobody dared me to type that, they want todeeeeeeeeeellllllllteeeeeeeeee tht BUTI SHALLOOOWWWWWWINSSSSSSSS

The Power to stick your head up your ass. Aka be a politician.

The power to turn into a sloth at random times.

To seek and destroy edward cullen! lol not kinda useless tho xD

The power ti find tiny shards of glass with your bare feet.

The power to fart upon command.

The superpower to read minds only if they think about nothing

The superpower to sleep in stinky in a fite

The ability to glow in the dark but only when your really sleepy.

Lactokinesis

The power to walk into a room and not forget what you where going to do.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!