The power to be Helen Keller at will.

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The power to become an extremely attractive straight man in only the presence of 83 year old homosexual men

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The power to believe that the only way is essex.

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The power to freeze time but you would also be frozen. Basically dooming everyone to be frozen in time with no way of getting out. No one would even know about it but it will happen.

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the power to hear a dog whistle

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the power to hope you get a job at the mall because they laid everybody off and sent the jobs off somewhere cheap

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The power to be invincible everywhere but your face

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The ability to not come back to life when you die.

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The power to orgasm every five.. UGGHOOOAAHAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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the ability to have 2/3 nipples.

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The power to....um.... shit I forgot That's Wat u get for wanting the power of amnesia

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The power to endure uncontrollable & highly noticeable erections at funerals

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The power to slam revolving doors.

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The power to be 10% more comfortable when sitting on a really uncomfortable couch.

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The Power to Combust

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The ability to orgasm every time you speak.

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the power to breath fire but only on days that don't end in Y.

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The power to sleep if your not awake

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The power to hold your breath forever, but only in a hot-tub.

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the power to lift anything under the weight of 2 lbs

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The ability to lactate air.

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the power to make ur fingernails fall and the go into a coma when someone says hello.

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the power to-OMFG IT'S TAILS DOLL!

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The power to kick a kid in the balls.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!