The power to get foot-boners

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The power to stop writing stupid shit on the internet.

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The power to become an extremely attractive straight man in only the presence of 83 year old homosexual men

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The power to freeze time but you would also be frozen. Basically dooming everyone to be frozen in time with no way of getting out. No one would even know about it but it will happen.

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Ability to sense moon cycle based on libido.

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The power to come up with pointless superpowers on a website about pointless superpowers.

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the power to hope you get a job at the mall because they laid everybody off and sent the jobs off somewhere cheap

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The power to stop making up pointless super powers and submiting them on a website called pointless superpowers

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The power of having night vision that only works during the day

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The power to shorten your lifespan by 10 seconds.

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The power to take control of mentally disabled turtles.

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The power to run at walk speeds.

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The power to give yourself a sinus infection

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The power to be 10% more comfortable when sitting on a really uncomfortable couch.

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the power to breath fire but only on days that don't end in Y.

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The power to realize that your personality is like a shithole.

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The power to touch someone's face while watching rain burn.

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the power to live a happy and fullfilling life...

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The ability to lactate air.

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The ability to suddenly realize you have Cancer.

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The ability to make up a new part of Pokemon, every time you sneeze.

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the power to make ur fingernails fall and the go into a coma when someone says hello.

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the power two float in the air for three seconds but only when you fell of a cliff - jesse

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The power to read but only when your using audio read.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!