The power to speed up wallmart lines; only if your're not in it.

The power to flip the world upside-down when you do a handstand.

the power to add .1 mile to the odometer of nearby vehicles

Giving a shit about someone's bull shit

The Power of Super Speed only when you climb a ladder

The power to continuously shoot extremely powerful lasers from your eyes unless they're closed or you wear special, unbelievably expensive glasses.

The power to run at the slowest speed possible.

the power to not own a spacial power!!

The power to transform into a vegetable, but only one way

the power to absorb other superpower, but no one have superpower

Customer: Waiter, there's a fly in my soup! Waiter: I'm terribly sorry sir, please let us replace your soup with a more satisfactory one which is hygienic, and does not contain a dead organism. Customer: Thanks.

The power to not be affected by bullets unless you are shot with one by a gun

The power to shorten your lifespan by 10 seconds.

The power to take control of mentally disabled turtles.

The power to have the money to buy anything in the world, however you only have enough money to pay for the price of the object and not the taxes.

Being Aquaman

The power to take your groceries from your car to your house in two trips or less.

The power to greatly enlarge your penis only if you are presenting.

The power to fart really smelly :P

the super power to remove your super power

The power to have the biggest boner ever in the middle of a presentation.

The ability to lactate air.

The power to turn pizza into math worksheets. -Big C

The ability to suddenly realize you have Cancer.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!