The power to speak with dead relatives, but only whilst masturbating.

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The power to talk to animals and have them partially understand you.

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The power to do EVERYTHING backwards

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The power to teleport your self 5 feet ahead of you every 3 seconds

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The power to always be the next best fighter in any 1vs1 fight to the death. MORAL: KOMBAT!

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Immunity to medication

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To be able to cut grass to the femtometer of any desired length, but only whilst standing in the eye of a hurricane.

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The power to withstand Justin Bieber's music.

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The power to levitate birds while they are flying....

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The power to be able to get up 11.5% quicker than the average perosn

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The ability to control water but only when it is raining

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The Power to think of a better superpower you could have chosen

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The power to give a **** about bigfoot

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The power to levitate mustard.

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The power to stop time for 1 second

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The ability to to wrote something useless and waste all Saturday that you need to use to study for a test.

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The power to die but once

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The power to fly but only on a foggy Christmas night

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The power to be 1% bullet proof.

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The ability to switch your fingers with thumbs, and your thumbs with baby corn.

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The power to touch MC Hammer.

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Grass eating

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The power to shape-shift into a chair, but only a chair

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The power to swallow chewed up food.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!