The power to never drop something, as long as it is touching the ground. - JC

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The power to buy jerky on a semi-weekly basis.

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the power to make stupid useless puns and not pay attention to the villian

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you can teleport anywhere in the world but every time you do you get punched by kimboslice in the face

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the power to be on time daily, but only after ur late

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See the answers to any question inside your head while suffering from severe dyslexia.

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The ability to revert any computer to windows vista. Works best on Linux operating systems.

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power to take a dump through your front (if you know what i mean)

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The power to be millionaire, but only when you have a million dollars.

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The power to explode the entire world every time you became happy.

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The power to teleport a real life Herobrine in your face

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The power to control your own mind.

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Hetsy overpay otay peaksay igpay atinlay

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The ability to create a chicken egg, once and then never again.

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The pewer to become a human bullet magnet. Moral: "DONT WORRY PEOPLE! I SHALL SAVE YOU ALL!" (Well if you want to sacrifice yourself to save them all, then you its useful and you a douchebag)

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the power of spontaneous combustion but only when you get an erection

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The ability to select which ad you want to be shown on any website, but only once per day.

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The ability to get aids and stay a virgin.

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The ability to move your own internal organs, causing extruciating pain

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The power to fly, but only inside an airplane.

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The power to sweat soup.

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The power to meme 20% harder

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The power to read people's minds, but only in the voice of Gilbert Gottfried

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Your average Axel entering a Phone Booth and coming out as... MORAL MAN! Moral: Where the damn do you find a Phone booth nowadays?

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!