power to orgasm over long distances

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Being able to shit a brick every time you blink

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The power to believe that the only way is essex.

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The power to read people's mind but can only read their minds when they are thinking about sex.

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the power to live forever but you'll die if you don't eat 100 coach roaches a week

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the power to view the same insurance commercials over and over for years and recite them from memory

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The power to smell any mans underwear without getting caught... (works only on straight men)

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The power to break out of jail when you're not in jail.

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Death at will

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The power to give yourself a BJ.

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Change the outcome of Disney movies 3 years before they come out.

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he power to absorb every 6th bullet shot at you

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The ability to talk to fish while in the desert.

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The power to lift any weight but only when you're lifting something light.

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The power to think of the most pointless superpower.

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The power to go "flame on!" without fire immunity.

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the power to see with your eyes open

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The power to become extremely strong unless there is someone stronger around you.

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The power to aquire pointless superpowers

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The power to make anything taste slightly more like spit.

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The power to make your parents walk into your room whenever you're masturbating.

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The pewer to kill elderly people by sneaking up behind them and yelling: MORTAL KOMBAAAAAAAT!

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The power to make green lights turn red on approach.

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The power to be your self

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!