The power to hear what your cat is thinking about.

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The ability to change the writing on signs

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the power to change the day to sunday at 5:59am

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The power to be a human for 1 second once a month.

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THA PWR 2 MiiSSPELL ERRTHANG WHiiLE WRiiTiiNG iiN AWL CAPz ONE THA iiNTERNET

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The power to build a building that is comparable to the sistine chapel, but without doors.

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The true motor of bliss runs on sex and ice cream with no flavor but calling august to see if life will eat us all or not. And she is. And he is. But the dance is corrupted with none-music and machin touch down there.....

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The ability to charge my iPhone, by starring at it real hard while rubbing my nipples!!!

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The power to differentiate between captal 'i's and lower case 'l's.

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The power to watch grass grow

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The power to make pot legal except when there's cops around.

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The power to have super strength, but only when your sleeping.

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The power to tell if a politician is lying. (They always are.)

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The awe-inspiring power of being able to throw up at will while yelling IMMA FIRIN' ME LAZOR.

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the ability to throw a midget further than any mortal man

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The power to time travel to the present moment

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The power to teleport someone into the nearest restroom after they've touched your thighs.

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The ability to laugh like tickle me elmo

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Ultra-strength when peeing

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The ability not cry while cutting onions, only after hearing the news that a family member has just died

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The power to steal all the money in the world without ever stealing anything ever.

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The ability to make your fingernails grow an inch whenever you like, but only on a Tuesday

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The power to get a boner any time you want

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The power to have courage to tell hitler that you are jew

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!