the power to change the day to sunday at 5:59am

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The ability to charge my iPhone, by starring at it real hard while rubbing my nipples!!!

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The power to have courage to tell hitler that you are jew

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The ability to immediately gain stage four stomach cancer.

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the power to fly but only on a plane

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The ability to shapeshift into any items but only pedophiles can use it

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the ability to "speak in tongues"...

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the power of 75% leviatation.

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The awe-inspiring power of being able to throw up at will while yelling IMMA FIRIN' ME LAZOR.

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The power to levitate only down stairs

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The power to have no powers

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The ability to make broken pens work again.

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The power to have super strength, but only when your sleeping.

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The power to restate the obvious.

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The power to always choose the broken condoms without knowing

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The power to time travel to the present moment

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The ability not cry while cutting onions, only after hearing the news that a family member has just died

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The power to make me a sandwich without first being instructed.

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the power to die when you breath oxygen

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The power to return my ps4 for the third time, and wait for months to get a new one only to discover its the tv connection which is broken and I cant afford a new tv because I already spent a lot of money on ps4 games. Mural: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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The power to confess crimes you haven't committed.

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The power to control which nut your sperm comes from.

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The ability to dance like Steven Hawking. xD

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The power to slash hot c u m on a girls big t I t s

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!