the ability to eat three tons of dirt

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the power to make food shrimp.

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The power to fly, but only when standing on ground...

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The power to clap with one hand.

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The power to be the ceo of BP

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The power to teabag bear- traps at will

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the power to tickle people just by looking at them.

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Being able to throw away the piece of toilet paper with which you wiped your ass without looking it.

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The power to see your neighbor without looking.

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The ability to kill Abraham Lincoln with the power of your thoughts. Hey, wait a minute...

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The power to hold your breath for one to two minutes.

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The ability to say "MISSING FINGERS" on Shitbrix.com

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The ability to fire a gun with precision accuracy. But only if your the target

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the power to have the power to have the power to have the power to have the power to have the power to have...

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the power to shit bicks

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The ability to float for half a second

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The ability to undo anybody's bra with your mind, but only when its not being worn.

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The power to poop out you penis

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The power to be awake when you're not sleeping.

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Power to turn your liver invisible.

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the ability to go the speed limit

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The power to run into a brick wall with an erection and breaking your nose.

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The power to read the entire Twilight series withou suffering brain damage, only once you have to read all four books in the same sitting.

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The ability to control the internet

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!