The power to levitate for 10 seconds only when having explosive diarrhea

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The power to fly... but you are a paralytic

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the power to murder Joey and get away with it

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the ability to hear yourself think

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The power to always have the worst thing possible happen

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The power to become the best racer in NASCAR, but only being able to turn right.

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the power to blind and nausiat yourself for 12 hours straight with no way to stop it ohh and the power the eat hairy dicks

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The power to pee, REALLY LOUD.

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The power to have any pointless power you want

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the power to eat sharp objects but you have to poop it whole

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the power to shrink to 1 inch but only in a crowded street and you cant look up girls dresses,

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The power to be able to insult that piece of shit Chuck Norris without bein... YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH! *dead* And of course the ability to type you`re death scream and you`re status after you`re dead.

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the power to say everything in Comic Sans font.

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The ability to procrastinate when you have absolutely no work to do

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The power to die when you get scared.

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The power to be alive, many hours before you die

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the ability to pee in your own butt.

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The power to see through objects, thus not seeing anything.

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The power to predict the past

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The power to be Rosie O'Donnell.

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The power to have sex with yourself.

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The power to divide by 0

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~The ability to understand Bob Dylan...~

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The power to smell any point in time

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!