The ability to eat fruit cake without gagging.

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The power to speak to toasters

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The power to become a fish for 10 hours on dry land

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The power to change into an Arab at will. Moral: Will not work inside arab-countries.

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Liam Brudenell

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The power of dying whenever you want.

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The power to rule the world unless it's in real life.

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Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

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Power that makes you perfect in being useless

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Ability to emit a low-level light, but only when standing near a candle.

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THE POWER TO NOT HAVE SUPERPOWERS! ...............ever

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the power to run in slow motion

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The power to hover a milimeter off solid ground when performing a walking motion.

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The super power to shine in daylight

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The power to never die unless you become sick, injured, or breathe through your nose:/

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the power to see through clear glass.

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The ability to make slightly off colored flags of any country that can not be used in combat.

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The power to kill you self.

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The power to have no power

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The power of reading the entire terms of service and understand it in less than 10 hrs.

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The power to find gold in your nose but only when you pick it in front of others

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The power to get stuck to doorknobs in dangerous situations

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the power to talk to people off long distances,but only with communicational devices.

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The power to be normal.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!