The power to recharge batteries by licking them.

thumb_up thumb_down +95

The Power to lost your Dankness every time you Breath.

thumb_up thumb_down +93

The power to be an ugly barnacle who is so ugly that everyone dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +91

The power to open any trash can lid with telekinesis if its within view.

thumb_up thumb_down +91

The power to get a boner whenever you see a rainbow.

thumb_up thumb_down +91

the power to fly but only during a severe hail storm

thumb_up thumb_down +91

The power to revive anyone....But only if they are alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +89

the power to stop masturbating every day

thumb_up thumb_down +89

teleport to the place where you stand

thumb_up thumb_down +89

The ability to invent a new language that no one else will ever learn.

thumb_up thumb_down +89

the ability to die on command

thumb_up thumb_down +87

The power of having a short attention sp-- Ooh shiny!

thumb_up thumb_down +85

The ability to stop only ONE bullet and ONE bullet only

thumb_up thumb_down +85

That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

thumb_up thumb_down +85

The ability to lose 0.000000000001 percent more skin per year.

thumb_up thumb_down +83

Superhuman strength and endurance but only when sleeping

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The power to open doors with your bare hands

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The power to grow the pinky nail of your right hand

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The ability to not drop anything ...when you're not holding anything

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The power to make your nipples hurt when you twist them

thumb_up thumb_down +81

whenever you want to sleep an anime starts happening in real life

thumb_up thumb_down +79

The ability to walk on your hands because your feet have nails in them.

thumb_up thumb_down +79

The ability to know when, and which elevator door will open first.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

The power to cause weeds to grow twice as fast as usual in your bed of prized petunias.

thumb_up thumb_down +75

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!