The power to poop almost instantly, but you always have the runs.

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The power to turn everything you touched into gold. A-hem. Midas, you listening?

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The power to have perfect vision, but only in pitch black darkness

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the power to do anything ...but only when you're dreaming, lasting only as long as you're asleep..

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The power drown in water

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The power to die at will

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The ability to walk on your hands because your feet have nails in them.

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the power to speak fluent clingon, but only to the non-metally disabled

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Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

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the ability to take an apple core out of the bin at will

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The ability to fart, hiccup, vomit, crap, burp, laugh, cry, scream and sneeze all at the same time

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The power to make any glass of water into milk

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the power to charge rechargeable batteries.

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The ability to hear people's thoughts after they've already said them.

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The power to magically generate drugs in your pockets, but only while being arrested or in a police station.

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To be able to make a pencil dull... Get it it point less!!!!!

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power to fly when your underwater

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the power to pre-tend your a animal ...

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The power to become a fish for 10 hours on dry land

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the power to be on fire always.(even when u are in water)

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The power to walk after gettin kicked in the nuts

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The ability to produce rainbows and yoghurt from your armpits.

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The ability to pass out at will.

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the power to fly in space

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!