The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

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The ability to turn into a really comfortable chair FOREVER.

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The power to know the word for potato in every human language... including binary (011100000110111101110100011000010111010001101111)

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The Power of Anti-Sex

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The power to shit diamonds, but only into magical underwear that turn diamonds into shit.

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The power to find gold in your nose but only when you pick it in front of others

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The power to use your dick/tits as your cellphone at any time.

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The power to never receive pop-ups when surfing porn, but only on gay porn

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Power To Throw Power Booger In Every 5 Seconds

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Power to make it rain sideways.

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Th power to have a 10 minute delayed reaction, so if you stub your toe 10 minutes later you scream like a f***nut

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The Power To Captilize The First Letter Of Each Word Without Thinking About It.

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The power to poop without wiping

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Immunity to everything but AIDS, bears, being choked with cloth, Donald trump, Energy Blasts, fire, guns, etc.

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the power to grill steak for a vegetarian

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power to make the most lethal fart know to man but only when you girlfriends is around

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The power to pick any lock as long as its open

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The ability to digest three types of earth elementals

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The power to lift animate objects in the same direction.

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The power to fly really fast, but only in one direction (down).

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The power to climb trees really fast, but they shrink when you do.

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The power to piss your pants whenever you want.

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The power to have no life and watch a whole tv series in a week.

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The power to open jam jar lids, however stuck they are.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!