the power to act exatctly like a pineaplle.

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To be able to go to the future but only at 1 second per second.

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The power to shrink without the power to return to normal size

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The power to be able to teleport through a random fat man's colon.

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The power to see any woman naked, but only if she's wearing to clothes...

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The power to secrete concentrated orange juice from your toes every time you secrete concentrated orange juice from your toes.

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Where to start? Ah yes...THE POWER TO NOT FREAKING DO ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!

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The power to divide by zero

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The power to type so damn many superpowers that your head is spinning, and wanting to keep doing it because you really like this thing, its so... fulfilling... Moral: What can I say, people fight so much over who is right, and go to war just to prove their points... I LOVE POINTLESSITTY! (Pointlessitty, is not a typo, its a shakespearean slip you ignoramoron) Fun fact: A shakesperean is by itself a grammatically incorrect word, but not a typo simply because I used it on purpose... wow thats crazy... agree? Then thumb me DOWN NOW!

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The power to make your shit sink or float on command.

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the ability to glow in the light.

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The ability to go forward in time at will.

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The ability to fly away, but there is a 99.99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999% chance that you will get hit by a plane while taking off.

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The power to have a godlike super human strength but it only activates during a REM sleep cycle.

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The power to stop a bullet from hitting someone you care about, once.

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the power to get married

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The power to pull any woman that just asked you for a shag.

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The ability to change Celsius to Farenheit.

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The power to wave your hands without ever tiring

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power to age faster

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The power to see why kids love cinnamon toast crunch

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The ability to read children's books twice as fast as any given child.

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The power to take edible shits.

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The power to make you`re erections so big you faint.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!