Acid tears.

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Astral Projection. Distance: .3mm

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The power to talk to animals but only as they are attacking you

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The power to run at the average speed of a normal person running.

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The power to whenever you watch tv you can only watch commercials.

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The power to date women if they say 'Yes' when you ask if they want to date.

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The power to always know the exact time.

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The power to see through things but you can't turn it off once turned on.

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The power to jerk off without using your hands

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The power to enter the dreams of people who regularly have night terrors

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the power of running at superspeed, whenever you are sat down

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the power to freeze people only when it's cold

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The power to levitate 3cm off the ground when no one is watching

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The power to be out of the kitchen... and a woman

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power to permanently shrink one eye.

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the power not eat more than one pringel.

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The power to get stuck to doorknobs in dangerous situations

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power to make the most lethal fart know to man but only when you girlfriends is around

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The ability to make knifes out of your own feces.

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The ability to watch movies in 1D

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The ability to have udders for nipples.

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the power to yell a math problem at will

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the power to guess anybodies breakfast

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The power to scratch your head 1% faster than usual, if it doesn't itch.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!