The power to read everything 2 seconds faster than usual

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The power to fuck your mum whenever you want

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The power to be really offensive after you finished a sentence U FUKING JAP

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The power to see everything that will happen in your future life when you die.

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The power to see through glass walls.

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The power of drawing perfects dog dicks, but not dogs at all.

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A follow up to the next comment bellow... (the irony) is that you also get the powers to type YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! And other quotes at random points... I got these powers... you do not believe me? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: GUANTANAMO BAY CUBA! Just making conversation... (throws random small dog in the trash container) last part was just me its not like you get the power to do what he does in movies :P

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The ability to recall lyrics of particularly terrible music with perfect accuracy.

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The ability to know if you're the only human alive.

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The power to live,but only when you are dead

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the power to defecate while standing up...

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The power of making toast land butter-side up

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The power to like any show

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Justin Bieber

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The ability to see things only as their component atoms.

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The power to become the best player in every Moral Kombat game there is. Test your Morals... TSHHH, test your morals TSHHH MORAL KOMBAT! Mortal: FEAR THE WRATH OF MORAL KAHN!

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The ability to know who is calling without looking at caller ID

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The power to be invisible but only to blind people.

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The ability to shoot apples, but they disintegrate in mid-air. Also, the apples are tiny.

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the power to like Liam Brudenell, That is pointless

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The power to slowly float upward with awesome evil aura whenever you laugh evilly (just like in the movies/anime/etc) Only to realize you are stuck up there until someone gets a crane or something to get you down...

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The power to have uncontrollable amounts of earwax so when you put in earphones they get covered in earwax

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the ability to give a potato an orgasm

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The power that allowls peopl to speel incorrektly. :B

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!