The power of learning

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The power to never be surprised when the toaster goes off.

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The power to change locations with: Michael Jackson, Elvis, Hitler, Stalin, and many more, simply by jumping up and down 3 times, and just in case of trouble, you can change back by doing the same this time. (good luck jumping inside a sealed casket smartass.

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the power to perminately bring jade goody back from the dead

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Having a bullet-proof skeleton.

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The power to turn Wii controllers into broken TV sets.

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The power to self destruct yourself 1 time and 1 time only

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Supreme pre-mature ejaculation.

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The power to grow your fingernails at 1.5% times the average speed, provided you contribute three hours a day to meditation.

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the power to talk backwards

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The ability to turn into an embryo

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the power to any ugly person love you.

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the power to fly but only 5 feet off the ground and at walking speed.

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ability to swim superhuman fast, but only if you're completely naked and dry

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the ability to eject a little steam cloud from your penis every time you finish peeing.

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The power to have a very keen sense of smell 24/7 but only when a fart is present

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The power to change different colours depending on you feel.

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the power to eat bread

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The power to sneeze scissors

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The power to turn trollface by yelling "TROLLFACE ACTIVATE!" You can turn human-face again by yelling "XYGNEFAGINTHYCHRSICXAIOXJIEHJFEIHFIGHEÅÆELFKEÆKFÆEFKEÆAKFÆEAFKÆAFKEÆAFKOÆEFOKEÆFKAÆEA" For a year in exact correct spelling/pronunciation.

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The power to regenerate, but only small cuts

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the ability to shoot a little steam cloud from your penis every time you finish peeing

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Radiation resistance inversely proportional to the amount of radiation around you.

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The power to run at the average speed of a normal person running.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!