The power to teleport, but in doing so you lose a limb.

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The ability to unbleep swear words on your tv.

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The power to read the future in a language you will never learn to understand. Moral: I read that "thy comment expects a billion red thumbs"... WTF does that mean?

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The power to ride a unicorn without a horn that can't fly.

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The power to implode when you have pee and you can't stop

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The power to fell pain 3 minutes after it happens.

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The power to turn delicious and tasteful food into useless brown mush.

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the power to imagine any women naked...but only as an octogenerian

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ability to swim superhuman fast, but only if you're completely naked and dry

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The power to be stupid reading this.

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The ability to type with your penis on your smart phone during a video chat.

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The power to turn trollface by yelling "TROLLFACE ACTIVATE!" You can turn human-face again by yelling "XYGNEFAGINTHYCHRSICXAIOXJIEHJFEIHFIGHEÅÆELFKEÆKFÆEFKEÆAKFÆEAFKÆAFKEÆAFKOÆEFOKEÆFKAÆEA" For a year in exact correct spelling/pronunciation.

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The power to whenever you watch tv you can only watch commercials.

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The ability to change the color of your socks while wearing shoes

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The power to put your finger in your brain, but doing so kills you and achieves nothing.

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The power to write pointless superpowers

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The power to enter a car, but only if the car is out of gas.

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The ability to forget what your saying every 3 seco- what was I saying again?

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the power to take a poo everywhere but on the toilet

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The power to get laid by your right hand.

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The power to be anyone you want but your still a nobody

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the power not eat more than one pringel.

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The power to fly but only when your eyes are closed.

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The ability to make water luke warm.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!