The power to have omniscience but can't speak and have Alzheimer's.

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The power to think you love her but you don't.

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The power to perform stan up comedy whilst sitting down

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The power to bring life to nobody, except Winston Chrurchil.

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The ability to seduce women when there's no women in the room

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The power to be fireproof under water

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The power to stand still for five hours

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The power become a kite but not when it's windy

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The power to act like Tommy Wiseau

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The power to Remove 23% of Lint from your clothing Using only A Lint roller.

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The power to lose your hearing and eyesight/

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The power to ma-FUK HER RIGHT IN THE PUSY

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Being a freemason

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The ability to turn into an embryo

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The power of temporary invincibility but you have to kill yourself first

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The power to vomit a thoroughly blended mix of pickles, cheese, onions, caramel, lead paint, octopi, boiling water, vinyl, super glue, hot sulfur froth, and hand sanitizer.

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The ability to fall into 1cm cubed pieces when startled. No ability to pull yourself together, or move while in cubes. Parts must be reassembled correctly to re-connect.

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The ability to taste only from your butt-hole.

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The power to start time only when it's on.

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The power to never stop shitting.

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The power to be called justin bieber

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the power to go back in time, but only back 1 second.

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The power to get an erection watching gay porn

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The power to become erect at the sight of a man's butthole, oh wait thats just liam flanagan

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!