The power to drown on land.

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The power to attract bullets when a gun fires

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Shoppers today in the mattress department we just started a great promotion.

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The power to make high definition photo a hammer (with a red comfortable heated handle with LED flashing lights) appear out of thin air. (Oh, and on a 8"x11" piece of paper of course).

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The power to communicate with your own toenail clippings.

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The power to propel urine at the top speed of the animal you most recently thought of.

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The power to know the ending of the book before you get there.

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the power to be nonflammable unless your on fire

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The power to teleport to any 3rd world country

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the power to talk to your elbow

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The ability to turn cement into pudding

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The power to become a forensic paranoiac raving lunatic at will... HEY! YOU! Why are you gonna give my comment a thumbs down eh? AND WHY A THUMBS UP? Are you gonna hack my account and kill my family? OH YEAH! OH YEAH? I AM GONNA KILL THEM MYSELF JUST TO TAKE IT AWAY FROM YOU! BAHAHAHAHA!

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The power to be black, but only if you are at a KKK meeting

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The power to make mace have no effect on your left eye - but double the effect on your right eye

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The power to rain fireballs down upon those you love.

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To turn instantly water proof while eating a burito

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The ability to bring statues to life but they can't move or talk

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The power to transform into a green extremely skinny and weak guy when you get angry.

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The power to Google "Google".

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The power of self mind control

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The ability to heal someone by trying to beat them to a pulp.

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The power to see why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch

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The power to uncontrally boop

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The power of funk, but only on Tuesdays between 2 and 3 AM.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!