The power to be distracted with grea

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The power to ejaculate lazer beams...

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the power to lower my blood presure to dangerous levels

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the power to make your best friend's crush fall in love with you, but not your own crush.

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The power to understand a joke 30 seconds later after the last person in the group did it.

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The power to type 1,000 words per minute, but only on a 12 key tracphone ®

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The ability to be smarter than the average bear.

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The power to see into the future and past but not remember any of it.

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The ability to instantly friendzone yourself.

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The power to give the wrong directions

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The power to be invulnerable to any type of bullets except lead and copper.

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The power to ride a bike

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The power to jump faster.

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The power too shot seeds IF you are not alive

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The power to fly, but only in microgravity.

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shit and piss at the same time

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The Ability To See When Your Eyes Are Closed

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The power of telekinesis over any object one is physically touching.

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The ability to become the most attractive person in the world, but only when you're all alone. Also, it doesn't show up on film.

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To teleport to space and then emediately suffocate.

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The power to read upside down...only when you're upside down.

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The ability to morph into someone else's left butt cheek

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The power to shift baroque and rococo era paintings proximately 2" up and 3" to the left.

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The power to melt chocolate at room temperature.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!