The ability to transform yourself in to a vibrator that is about to be used. Only works if you are gay.

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The power to no sweat in the cold.

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The power to give epic blowjobs, works only if you are a incarcerated, straight male.

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The power to touch MC Hammer.

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The power to jump 1 centimeter higher than you usually can

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The power of Acid Tears

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The power to tickle your own feet.

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The power to glow in the dark

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TREE POWERS ACTIVATE!!!!!!

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Having the ability to get Bulimia by looking at yourself in the mirror.

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the power to see the present.

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The ability to cry shampoo at will. But it still stings.

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X-ray vision that only works on windows

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The power to have superpowers in your dreams.

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the power to the power to put water in you whenever except fr when you are thirsty

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The power to greatly enlarge your penis only if you are presenting.

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The Power to smell a Fart before it actually comes out. -scratchy

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The power to have your piss turn to solid gold before it exits you.

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The power to glow in the dark but only when your really sleepy.

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The power to travel to a parallel universe where everyone who exists dies every .1 milliseconds.

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The power to understand this: Alucard: Father! I will stand against you! Dracula: Then it is time to kill your weak human side and join me in REMAKING THIS WORLD! (battle ensues Dracula takes a hell of a beating) Dracula: AAAAAAAARGHHHHHH! Heh... sarcasm... What is a man... if he gains the world, but loses his soul... limps away... Mark 8:36 I believe... Alucard: Father! I did not wish for you to die! Dracula: Uh I lost a sole, and the world is mine, already... Alucard: Well then lets keep fighting. Moral: Richter: YOU STEAL MENS SOLES! Dracula: The same could be said about every shoe shopper... Me: You are not gonna get this one, but if Dracula STEAL MENS SOULS! Then why would he have a soul to begin with? Its confusing... and the power to understand this is meaningless... BUT ENOUGH TALK YOU MISERABLE LITTLE PILE OF SECRETS! HAVE AT THY!

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Having the power of a normal human

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the ability to time travel 5 minutes into the past this power recharges every 5 minutes

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The ability to transform into a bucket full of water... With no idea how to turn back.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!