The power to continuously shoot extremely powerful lasers from your eyes unless they're closed or you wear special, unbelievably expensive glasses.

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The power to be powerless in situations u need them the most.

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Power to turn off your computer randomly. You cannot controll that power.

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The power to know what card is on top of a deck, but only when it's an 8 of diamonds.

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The power to know that Han Solo dies

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the power to hope you get a job at the mall because they laid everybody off and sent the jobs off somewhere cheap

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The power to break your Nokia phone.

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The power to control grass, not make it grow, but make it move in any direction you want.

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the power to read and agree with the terms of service

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The power to run 0.0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001% slower.

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The power to shit dirt!

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The ability to orgasm every time you speak.

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The superpower to think that you have a superpower

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The power to hold your breath forever, but only in a hot-tub.

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The ability to lactate air.

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The power to fly one millimeters above the ground.

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The power to hesitate when seeing naked girl.

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The power to go forward in time so you get defeated faster

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the power to laugh at something that isn't even funny

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The power to shit whole balogna sandwiches.

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The power to become me. Moral: You could not handle the awesomeness and would ruin yourself just so you can feel "normal" rather than awesome.

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The power to turn invisible but only when no ones around

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The power to make other people hold their breath.

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The power to summon Pedobear and only if you are under 10.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!