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Clarksonisms
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Motivational Generator
Objectiface
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The power to cease to exist at birth!
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+73
The power to have a small penis
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+67
The ability to teleport at a random point of the space.
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+65
The power to make it so legions of turtles submerge from the world seas in order to fight for the death in your name to save your ass whenever you are in trouble. Moral: Uh thanks for coming turtles... yeah I remember when I needed you 20 years ago... But thanks really...
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+65
The power to excrete food colouring from your sweat glands.
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+61
The power to reverse gravity but only when you're outside.
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+59
wast your time on the computer
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+59
the power to kiss your own ass
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+55
The ability to smell with your hands
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+55
The ability to unravel a ball of yarn with your mind
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+51
The power to fly but only in an airplane.
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+49
The power to levitate birds while they are flying....
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+47
The power to make cats burp.
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+45
The power to poop out your penis.
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+41
The power to remove seeds from seedless grapes but only on the 4th of may on a sunday
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+39
The power to see though Kashmir when people are around no wait that would be a good
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+39
The ability to travel back in time when and where there was a major plague- bringing only the clothes you are wearing.
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+39
the power to fly two inches above solid ground at the speed you walk
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+37
The power to fall off a tree, then land in spikes.
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+37
Spontaneous combustion... when on the internet
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+33
The power to walk forward and walk backwards at the same time in a lying down position while your asleep having a wet dream about goat puppies.
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+31
the power to hover 1 atom above the ground
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+31
The power to make anyone with the exact same genetic makeup as you bleed at a wound if there is a bullet imbedded in their head
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+29
The power to get hurt every other hour
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+27
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Pointless Super Powers
A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!