The power to drive better when you're drunk yet run into furniture once you get home.

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The power to change the color of your piss

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the power to be phone

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The power to do flaming flying kicks by yelling CAPTAIN FEET!

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the power to fly that only activates when you REALLY want to kill yourself by leaping.

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The power to seduce any woman by saying dorito, but you dont have any genitals.

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the power to mimic what people are saying if they are dead and underwater

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The power to kick ass and chew bubblegum but be all out of kicks. "sits down chews bubblegum"

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The power to eat just 1 Lays potato chip

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Black power

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The power to kill yourself

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the power to ejaculate when a hot girl walks by

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The power to reverse gravity but only when you're outside.

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The power to go your nose hair by 3 inches every 3 hours

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The ability to become invisible when noone is looking at you.

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The power to detach you`re penis and use it as a throwing weapon... to late you discover its not possible to attach it back :(

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The ability to be the newest post until someone else posts.

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The power to die at will.

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The Ability to ease hunger when you are full

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The ability to play UNO without a tongue

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The power to permanently grow huge wonderful extremely heavy dragon wings, which do nothing but to weight you down and stand in the way. Fly? Nope, in fact you cant even walk now.

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The ability to summon Cthulhu automatically when you reach the age of 23.5.

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You can read the minds of rocks.

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The power to fly upwards at Mach 3 speeds, indoors

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!