the power to eat 10 cotton balls every year

thumb_up thumb_down +52

The power to have superhuman strength. But I have to jack off to do so.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

the power to lose your power at will

thumb_up thumb_down +42

The power to be able to mate with squirrels and have offspring.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

having superpowers during the inquisition

thumb_up thumb_down +38

the power to fly but only upward

thumb_up thumb_down +34

The power to play a flute with your ass

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Just because you do not see and advert here, it does not mean it is not here... Moral: Dudu duduh dudududun... ALWAYS MORAL-COLA! (aka Moke in the brits) NOW IN LIGHT AND SUPERFAT EDITIONS! Order now for the special I am fagneto edition! TASTE THE FAGNETIC! Because if gay is your way, todays morals, support this way! Lesbian-Coke is out of stock, but pre-order now and receive a moral man offer: "the lesbian drunk party invite international live!" *porn music* Hurry up! Only 2 Billion tickets left! No wait... just 50 left!... no wait... 40... no 30... 29... you better hurry ladies! As much *free* booze you can drink! *The booze Is free, the entrance is free, but the payment to get out of the building depends on how much you drink, non payers will be graped and their sex pictures will be sold on the internet* *All lesbian sex pictures will be sold on the internet, grape is not allowed! Surprise sexy time is allowed though!* Moral-Cola!

thumb_up thumb_down +30

The power to be Helen Keller at will.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

The power to sneeze scissors

thumb_up thumb_down +24

The power of superspeed...which comes with horrible stamina and Asthma.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

The power to look what is at the back of your head.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

the power to control nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +18

the power to not have a power

thumb_up thumb_down +18

The power to walk over crisp packets 25% more quietly than the average person

thumb_up thumb_down +18

The power of always having small, thin clothes in the winter.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

The power to stop writing stupid shit on the internet.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

The power to die at will.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

the distinct ability to tell when a marine plant is mildly displeased with it's cells.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

The power to become extremely intoxicated only during job interviews

thumb_up thumb_down -2

The power to run at the slowest speed possible.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

The ability to have all your dreams be nightmares that you remember vividly.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Eht rewop ot epyt sdrawkcab dna kaeps ti yltneulf ekilnu eht yug ohw tog no eht tsrif egap.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

The power to have unlimited characters in youtube comments

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!