The power to think of hilarious intensely racist jokes, but only at Black Lives Matter protests.

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the power to permanently change your name to Graham

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The power to die just by trying to use the word l...

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The power to move 1 second into the future. Takes 1 second to work.

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The ability to dislike on any form of social media, but only if you are looking cross-eyed at your pinky finger while listening to a mashup of Justin Beiber and One Direction.

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The Power to make Anyone's Teeth Clean...

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The ability to go poop and pee.

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The power to achieve world peace but only at the expense of your own happiness and the lives of all your friends and family members and everyone will hate you for no reason after doing so.

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the power to know when it isn't either 4 or 9 o'clock.

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The power to make a watch that functions as a small phone and is named after a fruit. I would call it Applewatch.

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The power to be Rosie O'Donnell.

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the power to watch reruns of NBC's "Joey" in your head

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The power to sense if an object is sharp.

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The power to answer trivia questions, but only being able to do so in a loud, aggressive voice.

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The power to turn Justin Bieber into a Man.

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The power to chuck dead babies from a bridge

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the ability to turn kfc into popeyes

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The ability to find any lost pennies, as long as you're Jewish

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The power to give yourself a sinus infection

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The ability to give yourself brain cancer at will

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The ability to be a jewish, homosexual, black crossdresser in Louisiana.

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The ability to eat Oreos and not have diarrhea after.

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The power to blink your eyelids in Morse Code

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To sumon a cheeto named bill every time you say cow.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!