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The ability to summon Cthulhu automatically when you reach the age of 23.5.

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The power to think about thinking about having the power to be stupid

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The Ability to ease hunger when you are full

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The ability to shit from your mouth and burp through your ass

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The power to piss your pants each time you feel threatened.

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the power to give any goatAIDS using your penis

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the power to fart at the worst moments

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The power to permanently shorten your own penis

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The power to spontaneously poop every time you see a sheep.

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To be be able to be and throw fire without being fireproof.

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the ability to make your finger nails longer by 0.1 %

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Hetsy overpay otay peaksay igpay atinlay

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An ability to exist without any food but only after you eat some food.

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the power to shoot superman

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The power to shit in your eye

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The ability to cross the Do Not Cross tape at crime scenes

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The Power to bite your own ear.

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The power to time travel 1 second at a time

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The power to laugh at Tyler Perry's House of Payne

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The power to instantly determine when someone is a dumbass.

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The power to download anything you want to 99 percent complete.

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Hat seduction. 'Nuff said.

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The power to make every stop sign I see say "Stop HAMMERTIME"

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!