the ability to manually control your breathing

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The power to turn gold into lead.

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the power to shoot poop very far out your butt

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Reverse Pooping

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the power to like mass effect 3

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The power to turn a bear into a gopher.

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the ability to restart the universe over and over again until existence is ripped apart

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The power to tie your shoes...... while your on BOTH knees

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The ability to see into the past at variable times between 1 and 30 seconds but be incapable of seeing the present.

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The power to be jelous of your friend's new sports car

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I have the power to make /b sarcastic, witty and funny.

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the ability to never been seen by bus drivers.they just keep going, often through a large muddy puddle.

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The power to shape shift into water

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The power to make food from anything, but noone can eat it.

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The power to be lazy and a normal human being. The Average Joe Power.

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The power to post the same shit twice.

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"man hiding at the ladies room" "woman enters" SURPRIIIIIISEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeAERHG! Ok so now we know my dick fits up your ass... hi my name is... why you crying?

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The power to resurrect, but only in an electric chair in Texas.

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The power to touch MC Hammer.

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The power to create brilliant memes, but you don't have access to the internet.

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the power to eat with your butt

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The power to be indecisive about which seat you can take.

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The power to make somebody fall in love with anybody who isn't you.

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The power to have sex whenever you want, but only with Rosie O'Donnell

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!