the ability to spin gold into straw

The power to create skype chats with 50 people and subsequently annoy all of them with 200+ messages per second. unfortunately neither you nor anybody can block, silence or leave the chat

The power to move in slow motion whenever running away from danger. Moral: Hilarious! XD

The power to be any animal you want, but only if you are that specific animal that you want to be.

The power to fly at the speed of light, but then your pants keep coming off!

The power to have the aim of Torres

The power to actually ENJOY Dora the Explorer.

The power to turn freshwater into saltwater

The ability to have A's in all your classes, but only if you already have A's in all your classes.

The power to psychically flush any toilet in the world once every 27 minutes.

The power to control yourself

The ability to forget how to breathe automatically.

The power to move 1 minute forward in time every 60 seconds.

The ability to be in fashion.

the power uncontrollably explode expensive cars

The power to turn your fingers into penises.

THE SUPER FRIENDS HEROES LEAGUE OF SUPER HEROES OF LESSER USEFUL HEROES! KNIGHT FARTSALOT!: Fear my methane! You and me in one small room for 3 days and you will faint for sure! Uncle Diabeetush: Save their parents Captain! Ill take care of their children! Captain Novolin: I have great sugar level control! Help me! Evil Mistress Sugarpie is too sweet! Runald MagnifiCient Donalds: HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR WOOOOO! I keep American people from starvation! Remember kids less than 250 pounds counts as starvation! And their LEADER... MORAL MAN!: The hell am I introducing myself here for? Damn you Subconscious! How can you expect people to understand my genius of putting myself here! They are morons! Oh... hi everybody.. wazzup?

The power to see why kids love cinnamon toast crunch

The power to suck a golf ball through a garden hose

The power to grow a mustache with your pubic hair

the ability to wake up on an elephant

The power to become a laptop forever!

To be able to bend glass at will but if any of the glass breaks you break with it

The power to ejaculate laser beams.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!