- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to hear in the dark.

The power to fly inside of airplanes

The ability to spit mouthwash

The power to fly really fast but only in closets.

The power to sit for extended periods of time in front of the computer doing pointless things. The person who is reading this has that pointless superpower otherwise he would be doing something productive.

The power uncontrollably self destruct when you feel safe.

The power to turn aluminum foil into tin foil.

The power to fire lasers from my nipples.

The power to talk to plants but only when they have mean things to say.

The power to become a virgin but only if you've never had sex.

the power to be immortal, but only temporally

Strength to instantly kill anyone just by lightly tapping them, as long as they're physically stronger than you.

The power to read the mind of a cow that has produced a piece of cheese that has traveled 447,800 miles but only when looking at that piece of cheese

the power to create a meme

The power to do unto others as you do unto yourself

The power to grant underwater breathing to Mosquitos.

The power to magically generate drugs in your pockets, but only while being arrested or in a police station.

The power to journey into the future of the past.

make youself dumb

The power to be invisible to everything but security cameras.

the power to fire my lazer

the power to put paper to your nose and blow strange liqeud type substance into it.

Ability to emit a low-level light, but only when standing near a candle.

The power to induce vomiting after a crazy junk food spree.

Pointless Super Powers