The power to buy the newest iPhone without the charger...

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The power to know when a painting is crooked but it only works if the painting is noticeably crooked.

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The power to have any nice guy, but they're all gay.

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The power to magically summon a knife at a gunfight. Moral: "A knife in a gunfight is pretty good when the guns run out of ammo"

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The power to die

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The power to sneeze scissors

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to zap people but only yourself

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The ability to hear fish.

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The power to change colors to the excact same as before.

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the power to sleep while standing!

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The power to have a device to turn the tv off without touching it!!! :O

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have the power of making chicken appear when your a vegan

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The power to stay dry in the rain, while indoors.

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The power to be invisable but for only 5 seconds or the power to fly but only 2 feet off the ground.

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the power of losing and getting in 2nd place or 3th. the power of clearing your mind only for it to stay blank. the power of riding a horse really well aslong as you think it is a cow. the power of breathing AIR. the power of bellyflopping cement. the power of reading ancient arameîc. the power of speaking perfect gibberish.

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The power to transform into a paralysed turtle with half its shell missing

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The ability to pee while standing up for men

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Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

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The ability to swim in water.

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the power to disinfect wigs.

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the power to itch your teeth

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the power to guess anybodies breakfast

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The power to like the fact that someone liked my status.

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the power to turn into a rock and you cant turn back into a human

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!