The pewer to become a human bullet magnet. Moral: "DONT WORRY PEOPLE! I SHALL SAVE YOU ALL!" (Well if you want to sacrifice yourself to save them all, then you its useful and you a douchebag)

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The power to turn Justin Bieber into a Man.

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The power to talk to talking animals.

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The power to light little sticks on fire by rubbing them quickly on the box they came in.

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The ability to get aids and stay a virgin.

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The power to stop reading this. Or the power to live forever but only if you never ate BACON !

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The ability to move your own internal organs, causing extruciating pain

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The ability to pickle cumbers at an accelerated rate

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The power to walk through air.

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The power to time travel to the present.

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The ability to cure someone of HIV, but you contract it yourself.

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The power to be -100% faster...

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The power to meme 20% harder

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The power to see through bones.

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the power to erase your memory ffrom the last five seconds... but only if you are having a seizure

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The power to half your IQ and have it return to normal in an hour

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The power to change the channel with your mind, but only to the Weather Network.

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The power to have a black president

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the power to be nonflammable unless your on fire or be

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The ability to inaccurately predict the future.

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the power to walk through unlocked doors

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the power to not have power

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The power to instantly faceplant when jumping

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The power to wink with both eyes

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!